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Cameo - Single Life

A good number of times, when I inform people how long I've been single (a couple years or so), they're usually surprised by this.  Partly because I'm not a total schmuck/creep and also because it's a long time for anyone to not have been spoken for, at least for part of the time.

They ask me why is this so.  They want to know why I don't have a girlfriend.  Some offer to fix me up with people they know.  Some claim that they know someone perfect for me, then think aloud, "Why didn't I think of this before?  You guys would be perfect!"  Obviously, these "perfect" matches fell short of such aspirations.  If I am dressed particularly sharp or if I have raised my charm levels, I can also get the "How are you still single??" from people.

I don't stress over my current situation of freedom.  I don't need to hug a pillow at night or go party like crazy trying to fill some sort of void in my life.  How?  A few of reasons:

1. I'm used to it.  I've grown accustom to my life and my schedule as an independent entity.  My schedule, for the most part, depends on solely me.  I choose where I'm going and when. 
2. It saves money.  I don't really have to explain this one.
3. [Here's the deep one for you to discover]  I've thought about it and I've come to a very telling conclusion.  It's telling about me and about my bachelorhood.  Mainly, it boils down to this:  my "type" isn't good for me.  The prototype type girls that they sell you growing up as the kind to bring home to mom just don't do it for me.  The ones that are dangerously good-looking and have the look in their eye like they can make you the happiest person in one moment and can fuck up your world in the bat of an eyelash, those are more my speed.  

So, what's the solution to this?  Basically, there are 3 options:

1. Wait it out.  - This seems to be what I'm currently doing.
2. Play with fire.  - Goodbye, sleep.  Goodbye, money.  Hello, telephone.
3. Change my type.  - Easier said than done.  Might come with time?
   

Will I change?  Will the type of girl I like tone down some?  I try to stay away from poison, but is it really my medicine?  Honestly, I don't think about it all too often.  If I happen to meet someone, or re-meet someone, and happen to like them, then that's cool; it happens.  I'm not averse to "liking" someone.  But do I have my hopes set on something happening and some sort of future together burgeoning?  I submit that I do not.  If it doesn't happen, then it wasn't the right situation at the time, or we just didn't like each other enough.  Oh well, that's how it often goes, but there's always another train pulling into the station.  (Word to Wilbon)

I'm too caught up in my daily routine and what I want/need to do.  If I worried about being single all the time, I'd probably be miserable.  I've been in relationships before, obviously.  I know the things I'm missing out on, but I also know the things I don't miss.  And, for right now, I enjoy not missing them. 

This was just to address a common question that seems to surface.

Living Single Opening

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So, I like to play Street Fighter 4 online against people.  I prefer to play ranked matches against (more or less) random opponents rather than player matches against the same person repeatedly.  I enjoy this because you encounter a lot more styles from different people using different characters (even though the usual suspects remain rather prevalent).  Since no two people are alike, you get to learn how to deal with various attacks from numerous angles with varying follow-ups.  Peoples' aggression levels fluctuate, and of course their skill levels.  Overall, it gives you a good picture of how your characters fare against others and what you can do to counter their attacks.  It can be very engrossing.

That said, when coming across different skill levels of opponents, inevitably, you'll also encounter all types of opponents.  Meaning: sourpuss winners/losers.  If someone beats me and they want to make sure I knew they beat me by sending a little message my way, then fine - to the victor go the spoils.  Of course, if it's just stupid, I reserve the right to fire back.  They can always counter and we'll then see who falters with their words.

Basically, the way I see it, if you have to fall back on the lowest common denominator stuff, then you lose, i.e. cursing, mothers, etc. 

Someone named BIGALBZ beat me and messages me, "85 pts...ouch".  Uhh, okay??  Firstly, I really do not care about the online battle points as they come and go and mean nothing.  Yes, they are a good indication of skill level, but only if there's quite a disparity in totals of the fighters (I'd say ~1000 pt difference and you'd think the fighters are a tier difference).  Is that really how he wants to come at me?  Normally, I'd probably let that go, but I didn't feel like it at the time, so I fire back, "yup worth almost as much as your food stamps".  He gets uppity and goes with a mom insult, so he already lost; no point in firing back to such a low-level comeback.

Earlier tonight, I beat someone with the handle Deadly_Venoms_.  I say nothing.  I won, who cares; go on your merry way and fight someone else.  (I might add that I beat him convincingly.)  He feels the need to shoot me a message to voice his displeasure at his loss: "everybody dat picks vega is assssss!!!!!. u have no ground skills. u just wanna jump around all day."  Thank you for the enlightenment, DV!  Who knew that by whooping up on you, I'd also gain a knowledge jewel on my character like that!  I thanked him with a response:  "then you know what to do to win, you just... didn't."  Very graciously, he reciprocated my thanks with a "FUCK OUTTA HERE!!!!"

Really, people?  What exactly do they expect will happen for them by sending out these messages?  If throwing out verbal barbs is fun to them, then at least be able to keep up with it!  One response and they falter back onto generic cursing?  Money Mayweather has some great advice:  "Step ya game up!"  And not just your Street Fighter game.

I've also had some class messages, as well; they're not all bad.  If there's a particularly well-fought match, I might get a message stating how close it was and expressing gratitude in more or less words.  You know, the opposite of what LeBron James did after his Cavs got eliminated by the Magic.   Basically, it's exchanging a "good match" with each other and moving on.  That's good sportsmanship, though I don't expect it after every match because who is really going to type out messages to every person they fight online?  Sometimes, they suggest/request to add them as friends on PSN so we can have future matches, but I don't like adding people I don't actually know.

Just like in real life, it takes all kinds.  But just like in real life, ain't no half-steppin' - come correct or GTFO!

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homeboy:  love

 me:  word up

how was your bday?

 Sent at 9:00 AM on Wednesday

 homeboy:  holler

it was real chill

how goes it for you?

 me:  just keepin it regular, god

keepin the spends on the low

 homeboy:  are you at work right now ?

spends low?

 me:  sho

yeah, save the paper

 homeboy:  i think thats the case for everyone are you liquidating ?

 me:  ummm, i guess here and there

 homeboy:  and any new tricks?

you're been unloading?

 me:  nah, man.  i thought i said i was saving cash

 homeboy:  like what?

 me:  hahahaha

 homeboy:  go d

 me:  i sold an old ibook for like 2bills

so that was chill

 homeboy:  its hard to find new tricks

 me:  tru

but soon youll have london birds swingin, right?

piccadilly their circus

 homeboy:  i gotta take the gmat

and i've been slacking on that

 me:  tru

nah, you got that

handle it

 homeboy:  HAHAH

london birds are not that cute

and i guess gf's are commodities

 me:  yeah, but theyre prob better on the phone than high-pitched bolsa girls on the phone

 homeboy:  and just crash it

and if they want to start trouble

HAHAHHAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA

 Sent at 9:06 AM on Wednesday

 homeboy:  Yeah where do those underage UCI chicks go ?

i want to end them

 me:  you gotta ask charlie

hahah

 homeboy:  charlie?

 me:  i avoid them by default because i try to avoid UCI dudes

yeah, charlie kim

he prob knows

be all studying at uci before and ish

 Sent at 9:09 AM on Wednesday

 me:  you mean you dont dip your pen in company ink?

pull out the engineering card, push up on the receptionist

 Sent at 9:10 AM on Wednesday

 homeboy:  hahaha

i would

but all dudes here

charlie kim ?

from dynamic autosports?

 me:  yeah

haha

 homeboy:  yea

he is pretty trill

i saw him at a clothing store event

attic

once i realized there were no girls i started to drink

and then took off

 me:  ha

why even drink

that increases the chance of some random lonely dude striking up a convo

 homeboy:  just to make the best out of a bad situation

 me:  i hate fucking 'lonely dude'

 homeboy:  HAHAHAHHA.  True.   But also to numb me of guys that are into "streetwear"

 me:  "wack ass ration, huh, dogg?"

dont even talk to me with that

not helping

 homeboy:  HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

 me:  *ratio

 homeboy:  Nah, man i'm entertained by those guys.  I just listen to them talk, and see what they know

and then throw them a curve ball

I guess i am a simple man

i just want to get my dick wet

 me:  yeah, that works sometimes

but theres def a threshold

 homeboy:  i especially like the one-uppers

usually they are super insecure

and only a master in one particular fiel d

 me:  yeah, the trick with those dudes tho

 homeboy:  so when you throw them a diff. subject,  one you know that they would have no idea about,  they just stay quiet, i like to view people as response systems

 me:  is when they act like they puttin you on to something, just act like you dont care that you dont know about something or heard about something/someone

 homeboy:  HAHHAHAHAHHA

 me:  you can tell that it crushes them inside

 homeboy:  zzz zzz zzz

HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAAH

 me:  like they had to special order some magazine from germany with an exclusive interview with a japanese designer to come up with what theyre telling you

and youre like .... whatever, imma go read Cargo.

 homeboy:  HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 me:  how player is that, meng

hahahah

 Sent at 9:21 AM on Wednesday

 homeboy:  HAHHAHAHAHHAH

so you been twittering a lot says yuki

any particular reason?

 me:  just random shit to get out of my brain

so i dont have to think about them anymore

its like writing it down, without wasting paper

or having to carry paper

yuki tho, jesus

twitter maniac

 homeboy:  HAHAHHA

yeah

 me:  at least with twitter tho, its diff stuff

 homeboy:  yuki is nutso dude

its pretty amazing acutally

 me:  its not like the same posting over and over like it was on his myspace bulletins

yeah, yuki got some drive

pause

 Sent at 9:26 AM on Wednesday

 homeboy:  yeah

he has new content for shut

 me:  i dunno how dude doesnt just overload

hit the reset button

AND he has a girl?

wtf

 homeboy:  yea

he does

 me:  thats crazy

girls, man

they can ruin your life

hahaha

 homeboy:  dude seriously

 me:  you can think you got everything in place and go a rhythm down, then they come with some ridiculous shit for attention

 homeboy:  HAHAHHAHAA

yeah they are like babies

infants

 me:  yeah

too bad a trip to Orange Julius cant solve everything tho

 homeboy:  HA

dude

i just want to choke bitches

 me:  real shit.  they like that.

 homeboy:  so no new girls for you ?

 me:  whats your new shit now these days?  besides GMAT, whats takin your time?

 homeboy:  building my car

and looking for new tricks

 me:  nah, i got my ish on recession mode.  but we'll see, coming up.  summertime is singles time.  who knows.

skin is in

 homeboy:  for sure

 me:  building your car?

you mean you dont stay home playing Rock Band errday?

 homeboy:  HAHHAHAHAHA

nah

man

yeah

building the red car

almost done

the way i want it

 me:  perf

you got another one coming down the pike?

once youre done

 Sent at 9:35 AM on Wednesday

 homeboy:  i have another car i want to fix as well too

Its an old BMW

in my drive way

a convertible

 me:  the titties is out

 homeboy:  HAHHAHA

what i want to do is

is to roll to the club

but not use the doors

and just hop in

 Sent at 9:38 AM on Wednesday

 me:  money

gotta practice to make it smooth

aint trying to hit no armrest

smash the wheel

 homeboy:  HAHAHHAHHAAHAHHAHA

exactly

so whats goig with you ?

 Sent at 9:40 AM on Wednesday

 me:  just been working, saving cash

ill go out now and then for a bday

but i been real boring lately

maybe ill go out a bit more coming up, just to change it up

looking around at jobs, just to cover my ass and whatnot

 homeboy:  word

 me:  everyone should be doing that anyway

i think i might take up a hobby

 homeboy:  you're right
never crossed my mind i was gonna get axed
but i should def. be looking just in case

 me:  maybe even a class or two

yeah, its good to know just the pulse of whats out there

even not just for you

cuz you def will know someone looking at some point

and you can put them on

and theyll def remember that ish

 homeboy:  Word

for sure

yeah

 me:  and they can help you down the line

 homeboy:  takea class and pick up a new hobby

for real

 me:  yeah man

overpaying for alcohol just aint a real smart hobby no more

 homeboy:  of course

thats true

thats why i just drink in the car

and then hop in

 me:  yeah, i used to do that, too

im laying off the drinking tho

esp if im driving

 homeboy:  really?

why is tha t?

 me:  the law be changing, man

 homeboy:  OH HELL YEAH

dude

http://acontinuouslean.com/

why is there a new law in effect?

 me:  nah, well, not really

it just seems like cops need more money, right

so of course theyre gonna be more vigilant about shit

and let less shit slide

thats a classy blog, my nig

imma have to save that one

add it to my reader shit

yo, that Cramp bag on there is ill.  thats money.

 homeboy:  yeah

its just proper mens wear

i love it

 me:  thats the way to go

 homeboy:  fuck yeah

i hear you on the cops

crfacking down to fund their salaries

 me:  f'real

and yo

DUI

in Canada

shit is a felony

you cant cross the border without some hassle if you got that shit on your record

heard some dude talkin about that shit

had to do business in canada and they were giving him static cuz his record showed him as a felon cuz his DUI

aint that some shit

 homeboy:  FUCK

man

 Sent at 9:51 AM on Wednesday

 me:  and summertime is when a lot of them happen

cuz thats when folks go out

instead of staying in or going to houses

 homeboy:  hmmm

that makes sense

 me:  just sayin

 homeboy:  we should all be careful

 Sent at 9:52 AM on Wednesday

 me:  im straight with being DD tho

if someone hooks up the grinds (eats), im good

what a brotha really wanna know is, where we eatin after

sanamluang

probably

 homeboy:  dude

sanam luan

is bomb

 me:  pretty much hit that ish after everything in LA

met some breezy there

she was dope

then we went out to dinner

and i saw her fingernail polish wasnt maintained

tip off right there

 homeboy:  http://egotastic.com/frame?url=http://link.brightcove.com/services/player/bcpid21821663001?bctid=21845810001&w=470&h=350&info=Megan%20Fox%20Esquire%20Video

HAHAHHAHAHA

so you straight up dropped her from her finger nails?

you're a bad dude

 me:  nah, i mean.  she was cool.  but... thats some serious doubt.

you gotta do some detective work

profiler almost

 homeboy:  of coure

i always do det3ctive

work

i make them take a personality test

i tell them its fun

 me:  straight

 homeboy:  but then i read their profile type

 me:  damn, you ahead of the game

you a step away from issuing disclaimers and waivers

sign here here and here.  initial here and date it.

 homeboy:  HAHAHAHHA

nah

its funny

i usually set it up like

hey i just got an email from a friend this morning, and he told me to take this personalityy test

its fun

take it

they give me the results

and then i read it

 Sent at 10:00 AM on Wednesday

 me:  yeah

you gotta throw some comments in like

"what do you think about yours?  i thought mine was alright, i mean some stuff was maybe a little off."

 Sent at 10:02 AM on Wednesday

 me:  mental is def important

cuz thats whatll piss you off most down the line

 Sent at 10:05 AM on Wednesday

 me:  mental is def important
cuz thats whatll piss you off most down the line

 homeboy:  hahaha

of course

 me:  i dont really care too much about like what clothing brand girls be wearing

we all in different situations in life

 homeboy:  of corse

not i need a smartish girl

 me:  just sayin.  wear your shit, but be smart about it

 Sent at 10:08 AM on Wednesday

 me:  def

young girls, theyre bad at assessing situations

cant have that

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Corinne was walking along the second story walkway of her local suburban mall, searching for a good casual pair of jeans to wear since it was the start of Spring and she wanted the feel of new clothes on her body.  Her name was originally going to be Karen, but around month seven of the pregnancy, her mother wanted more flair to her soon-to-be daughter's name.  Corinne appreciated the gesture starting in her teenage years as she started to realize that the name Karen felt to her more like a middle-aged school teacher who wore brown pencil skirts and her dyed auburn hair in a bun everyday, assigning students more busywork than actual through-provoking learning material.

As she entered The Gap, the store alarm went off even though she had no tags on her or any recently purchased merchandise from any other store either.  "Don't worry about it," the greeter at the store told her.  She didn't, it happens all the time.  The sensor alarms at stores go off pretty often without so much as perking the interest of most people in the store.  It's only when someone looks back with a guilty face or scuffles off like they have to use the bathroom do people give a second look of suspicion.

She passed through the newest merchandise at the front of the store, enacting self-discipline to not try on a tempting light green jacket that she knew she could happily wear for work.  She made it past the underwear and body section without so much as batting an eyelash.  When she finally arrived at the denim section in the back of the store, she noticed a young girl approximately 15 years of age trying on various jeans.  She had a pair on that she was checking while looking at the selection for some more to compare the fits with.  The jeans were about one or two sizes too small, causing noticeable muffin-top, and had extraordinary flare at the bottom of the pant legs.  Not a particularly flattering look for the 5'2" blonde that also had on a black baby-t with a sequin butterfly across the front.

Corinne tried not to pay any attention to her whilst perusing the sale section for some jeans of her own, but she could not help but notice the teen in her periphery. It was especially difficult to ignore the cellphone conversation she was having with one of her friends apparently about a party last weekend where she got "sooo high" and had "sooo much fun."  She didn't need to know that her drunk friend puked in her sweater in her backseat because he thought it was a bag.  She also didn't need to know that James, the boy she thinks is "sooo cute", was fingerbanging her in the hallway but stopped when someone came around offering a beer and conversation about how lame their math class is.  They tried to play it off by slowly moving his hand around to the side and eventually out of her pants, but she thinks that he noticed. 

After sufficiently being disgusted with the youth of her town, Corinne decided that The Gap wasn't the store for her today and decided it was time to head home and start cooking dinner.  She was going to make a chicken alfredo with rotini pasta and a side of buttered artichokes.  She got home and kissed her boyfriend James hello upon entering.  He wanted a little something more, she could tell by the way his kisses hung there instead of just ending cleanly, as kisses tend to the more you kiss your significant other and establish a rhythm and technique, but she just couldn't muster up the desire to get into the mood for much more than that. 

He asked her, "what's wrong?"

She replied, "I hate when I can't find jeans."

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Lately, people around me have been getting older.  Of course, I'm not ageless, but they're older than me, so I can phrase it like that.  They're further along in their life development, anyway.  They're getting married, having babies, buying property, etc.  It makes you start thinking about long-term types of goals and aspirations. 
There is not a defined "finish line" of success, but the "finish line" of death.  The smaller "finish lines" of success (okay, I'm sick of those quotes by now, too) before death are largely arbitrary and subjective.  They're more like lap times, though the lap distances can vary.  Maybe this is a bad metaphor, but I've past beyond the point of no return. 
Let's move past that metaphor itself though; we're done with that.  Since we like things packaged in threes, I've broken down this game of life finish lines into three basic and interrelated elements (using alliteration, as well, of course!): Pedigree, Percentile, and Promotion.
Pedigree are the natural traits you are born with and certain socio-economic factors you are born into.  Percentile is how you move yourself up in your world and what you do to improve yourself and your situation.  Promotion is your sphere of influence and just how large your "pond" is.  Pretty basic and self-explanatory, right? 
Even with a good Pedigree, you can't raise your Percentile without Promotion and you can't increase Promotion without raising your Percentile, though Pedigree contains in itself a certain amount of Promotion.  You can have a high Percentile even if you have low Pedigree, but only if your Promotion level small.  I admit, this part gets a little dicey, but I think you can follow the relationships here.
This is the game that we are born into; you can't choose to play or not. If you don't feel like playing, that's just the decision to keep a low Promotion level.  If you choose to "compete", then you work on your Percentile within your Promotion.  Then, when you hit certain plateaus in Promotion, it knocks your Percentile back down because of this new tier that you've entered.
Admittedly, this idea is obviously not totally flushed out - it was more of a passing idea that came to mind.  It can definitely be refined, but the main thing is I wanted to come up with a concept of three elements using alliteration.  Whether I believe in the concepts I put forth here is irrelevant; I just want to bring them up.

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During my work life, a lot of people ask for my help -- that's the job.  Sometimes, I ask for some clarification just so they can help me help them.  Clarification does not include, to my knowledge, further muddling the situation with irrelevant anecdotes and explanations of questions not asked.

Here's an example:

Hi Eros,

I hope I can provide you with some background and also ask for some understanding.

Our records are incomplete with regards to this customer who is Indonesia and the deal was done well (years) before my time so my knowledge and others here is very limited.  Add to this that we are dealing with a third world country who does not speak English very well, poor telecommunications (sometimes you just can't hear them on the phone) and a partner that adds an extra layer to communications, sometimes (actually often) the message gets mixed up or misunderstood. Often, we spend a lot of time trying to interpret what the customer wants/needs and what the history is around it - much patience and conversation backwards & forwards on simple items required.  These are the realities of South East Asia. You have to think of it as journey, not just a conversation.  So it's not quite cut and dry when you ask me to "clarify as to how this is no longer a license transfer when it was requested as a transfer previously" because I am just not sure I understood the customer correctly. As an interesting side note, I was in a Bangkok club last week listening to a Thai Band playing western (English) songs. They were substituting words in the lyrics for similar words but ones that had a vastly different meaning and so what become obvious was that we just can't take it for granted that when they speak English, they actually know what they are talking about or are using the words in the correct meaning/contexts.

Anyway hopefully with the information you have and the information we have we can complete the picture, know exactly where we stand and service this customer appropriately

Dude, seriously?  I have to think of it as a journey and not a conversation?  This does not bode well for getting straight answers.

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NJS is seriously the best music for a club/house party for me and my peer group.  I can at least make that general statement, as opposed to a huge sweeping statement that goes beyond that.  You know old white guys and death metal kids won't be getting down to Teddy Riley in the same way (though you might be surprised sometimes!), but for my peer group, this shit is the best.

The shit is just perfect to dance to, sing along to, and just let your shit go (not literally.  well, if you got a radio in the bathroom, I ain't trynna hold you back.).  The beat got that bump and that bounce, the lyrics are relatable and melodious, and the dances are hella energetic without being on some Nordic Track bs. 

I know, you either love it or you don't care what I'm talking about right now.  I just love it.  Gets me in a good mood.  I suppose it just fits in that perfect window where the music that is out and popular when you're a certain age really sticks with you.  NJS hit that window for me.  Seriously, back then, folks was dancing and just having fun with it.  There were a bunch of dance moves hittin all the time and it was cool to be out on the dance floor.  Just a few years later, folks ain't into dancin no more.  I mean, I know nowadays, hella folks are peepin dance shows and checkin routines and blahzay blah, but it ain't really that many times that you gonna walk into a club like Usher and just hit routines all night.  NJS is perfect for going out and just moving and enjoying yourself and letting go without that preconditions of this or that, but then you also got hella different dance moves.  Some might look goofy nowadays, but they're hella perfect for the time and music, and they ridiculously fun to act a fool with. 

I'm sort of rambling, and I know it.  Maybe you should just watch THIS instead and see what I mean.  It's a damn PARTY up in there!!  Amongst me and my friends, and my peer group, I don't know no other music that can get the party moving and people happy like New Jack Swing.  I mean, Golden Era Hip-Hop is numero uno with me, but even I can recognize that just not everyone falls in line with that when I'm out.  The ladies is just not as into it as much, just by numbers.  I mean, there are definitely some 'heads that are female, but by and large the females ain't hanging with it as much when some Black Moon or BCC or Cell Dwellas come on; they just aren't.  But you play THIS and it's ON.

Another thing is that at that time a bunch of folks was coming out with mad different steezes.  It just added on to the creative atmosphere and it was really appreciated; people were trying to be cooler than cool but it was also okay to be kinda out there.  PLUS, and I know you'll love this Niko, you could still rock your pompadour you had been sporting from when you were partying to Freestyle shit.  But that's another story for another day, hahaha!

[Note: I know that this entry wasn't as edited and proper as other previous entries, but I just felt like getting that out there.  If I sound less educated this time around, consider it as if you now have more of a glimpse as to what I sound like when I'm talking, hahahha!] 

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