Posts (page 2)
My hair has been buggin me lately, so I've been meaning to set up an appointment with my friend/stylist for a haircut. The more I looked at magazines with pictures of guys with long hair, the less I wanted to keep my hair any sorts of long. Either they A) looked a mess B) had a different hair type than me, so I wouldn't be able to style it similar to them except with more effort I was willing to put in day in and day out. The longer I waited, the shorter I wanted to cut my hair, oddly enough. But I waited long enough that my desired style became too short to justify paying salon prices. So, snip snip, I did it myself. Here's the before & after:
Those were both today. The good part about shorter hair is the faster showers (save water & $) and quicker getting ready time. I usually am more motivated to go to the gym when I have shorter hair, too, because I don't have to worry about those long showers or my hair getting in my way when I'm working out/playing basketball. Fitted hats feel roomier with shorter hair, too. And I don't do that thing where you brush back the hair behind your ear or whatever. And if I'm grappling/fighting, they have to hair to pull on. Of course, it would hurt if they got a hold of my earrings... =\
A weird aside: I usually wind up cutting my hair short during winter. An odd habit, but this is around the time when I usually start getting sick of the long hair that I suffered through the hot summer with. Go figure. I just have to remember to always keep a beanie in my car, just in case.
Earlier today, I was thinking about moving out and perhaps taking a vacation in Europe, a desire recently rekindled by the fact that my cousin and his new bride just had their honeymoon in London. Then I was like, as much as I want to see the Eros statue at Piccadilly Circus... F it; I'll just move to Stockholm. Seems like a dope place, right? So then I go to the kitchen to put something together for lunch and I turn on the tv. I flip along some channels and land on, yup, the Travel Channel and they just happen to be playing a show on Stockholm, Sweden. How serendipitous, no? It's a sign... So is the weak ass dollar, too, though! Sad!
But, obviously, you know who I am:
So, I was watching college football this weekend and one of the commentators recanted this old wisetale passed on by old folks to teach people a lesson. I've heard it before, but since being reminded of the story, it keeps coming to mind (pardon if I butcher it, but I think you can get the main points at least):
A turtle is walking along in the forest, and just before he was to cross a stream he encountered a scorpion. Frightened a little, he tried to keep going, but the scorpion stopped him and troubled him for a favor.
"Hey, would you mind giving me a lift to the other side?" the scorpion asked.
"But you're a scorpion," responded the turtle, "what if you sting me?"
"Oh, but I promise I won't. I mean, what good would that do? We'll be crossing the stream together so if I sting you then we're both going down," retorted the scorpion, pointing out the logic that works in his favor.
"That's true..." the turtle said, nodding his head in surprised agreement. "Alright, hop on and we'll cross to the other side."
So the scorpion gladly hops on the turtle and they go into the stream. The current isn't too strong and everything is going fine; it looks like they're going to make it to the other side without a hitch. However, halfway across the stream, the scorpion turns and stings the turtle.
The turtle is shocked. The venom takes hold quickly. Losing feeling and control of his legs and body, he knows that they are both about to drown in what should have been a relatively easy stream to cross. Just before his body completely lets out and they go under, he asks the scorpion, "Why? After you promised me you wouldn't, and even knew yourself that it would cost us both if you did so, did you go ahead and sting me anyway? We would have made it safely across and could have gone our merry ways..."
After a brief pause, the scorpion told him the answer:
"I'm a scorpion. That's what I do."
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Sting and Bret Hart's finishing moves, obviously, were both the Scorpion Death Lock, though Hart would dub his "The Sharpshooter".
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This is what I do:
I was a best man at my cousin's wedding over the weekend. That's not my cousin next to me (that's my other cousin's husband). The reception was at the Pasadena Museum of California. The gallery downstairs had a Homies exhibit, had'em all. Good times. The bacon-wrapped hot dog guy hired for the end of the night was dope, too. His grill was pretty big so we were getting like two-at-a-time. Eating bacon-wrapped hot dogs while wearing a tux in the back area of an art museum? How we do.
This is Cole. He's the newest addition to the family. He's a really good dog that we adopted from a lady who, unfortunately, couldn't keep him. She didn't charge me an adoption fee, but she screened us along with other candidates to make sure he was going to a good home. Although he had no fee, per se, I gave the lady a thank you gift for her troubles. I know it's not the same as a dog, but I wanted to show my appreciation somehow.
He's already found a new favourite toy here, the squeeky plush ball in the video. He had some favourites of his own that he brought along, but he's seem to take to this toy pretty quickly, much like King took to his giraffe toy mentioned in The Lorre D Report #003.
He seems like a really nice dog, and he's good off of the leash! He won't bolt out the door, which is definitely a bonus. His coat is a bit short right now with a recent summer haircut, but it will soon grow back out to look more like his Chow Chow coat. He's a Schipperke-Chow mix and ~20 lb. He has a lot of Chow visual characteristics (even the purple tongue), but at a Schipperke size.
He's a really nice boy and I look forward to our time together. I'm sure King would have liked him, too.
I've been alone much of my life. I've tried to avoid being dependent on other people for my happiness because that means that it's also out of my control when it could be taken away from me. Since roughly sixth grade, I've always envied stoicism and held it in high regard. In fact, I bought Marcus Aurelius' book on stoicism at a young age and it struck a nerve with me and made lots of sense. At the time, I thought it was wisdom, but the more I've lived, the more it seems as simply self-protection. Which may or may not be seen as wisdom, depending on how you view things.
The thing is... would I trade those happy memories and time together in order to protect myself from feelings of pain and loss? Is it more worth it to me to not be hurt and not have experienced the joy that I now miss? The answer for me is of course not. Though our time together was relatively short, I have zero regret for having shared it with King. This is one of the lessons that King taught me. A lesson about life and love, and how a life alone pales in comparison to the life one can live when they find someone they can love and trust and shares those same feelings in return. Any dog-lover can relate to this and knows exactly what I'm talking about. I'm not the only one to experience the joys and pains of having and losing a perfect friend. Knowing this is gives me some comfort, along with the kind words of support that my friends and family have shown.
I've never shed so many tears for any other reason in my life. I've never been as close to anyone as I was with King. He is the only one in my life that has been by my side day and night that I've had to say goodbye to, and so suddenly. But the time that he gave me and the lessons he taught me won't go so quickly.
We were both fortunate in the way we found each other and came together. Not just because of our circumstances at the time, but also in what came from us being together. His memory will continue to be strong as I try to live the lessons he taught me. He was a big part of why I had recent happiness and will be a major part of my future happiness.
His lessons did not include wallowing in regret. Though I'll always miss him being with me in more than spirit, I won't let that takeover the positive things that I should hold on tighter to. As much as I may blame myself and think of all the "what if"s that could have changed things, I can't just keep fixating on that or else I'd keep disappointing King and his memory further. I'm sure King would rather be remembered with a smile more so than a tear. Though I can't promise that I won't let another one fall in the future, I can say that I'll focus on the good things because dwelling in guilt becomes rather self-centered in the end. And if there was a point in what I learned from King, it was to move away from such a selfish, lonely existence.
Thank you, King. I'm starting to come around...
I'm sorry, my friend. You deserved to live so much longer. You were such a good, happy, and gentle dog and the perfect companion for me. I'll never be able to forgive myself for letting this happen to you. You deserved so much better. So many things I wish had went differently. I miss you more than you'll know. You're my god damn heart, King. You should be with me right now, enjoying all the tummy rubs you can take. That's all I had planned, all that was on my mind on my way home yesterday. I never got to say goodbye. I wish I could feel like you had some sort of peace. You were so young, happy, and healthy. I'm so sorry I let your smile slip away from us way too soon. I feel like there's a vice on my heart and I hope that you'll forgive me and still watch over me. I wish you were still here. You were perfect for me and made me so happy. You've become a big part of me and I'll never be able to thank you enough for that.
I remember your faces, your expressions, your sounds, your habits. I miss them. I miss them all so dearly. My future always had you in mind. We were supposed to grow old together. You were my partner in crime.
I got so used to you being so happy. Your smiling face and wagging tail always there to greet me, so excited when I would get home. Looking back, I could see your face even happier on the day I took you home:
